Real Est-HATE (Part I)

WARNING: This is a ridiculously long and rambling blog -- I wrote it more to get the story out than for you all to read, but knock yourself out...

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afternoon, 6-20-06

OK, so I've put off bitching about this real estate deal for a month now, but I can't hold back any longer. After many absurd twists and turns, I was scheduled to close today at 11AM and I finally was beginning to think all would be well, and I would be "out from under" at long last. The final requirement was that I have the house professionally cleaned (btw, really?), which was scheduled for yesterday morning. So I go over to let the woman in at 8AM, and while I'm there, I notice the ground in front of my unit is wet. I think, "Hmm, that's odd, I wonder where that's coming from?" A brief irony passes through my mind, gee wouldn't that just top everything off, if there was some huge water problem today of all days... but no, its probably someone was watering the shrubs or something...

Upon my return at about 10:30AM to pay the cleaning woman, I noticed there was some water in the entrance to one of the bedrooms. My first thought was that she had spilled water there when mopping or something. I soaked it up, no biggie. I proceed to do the FINAL FINAL check of the house (I'll never be there again, right?) and drive away. I notice the water in the front yard is still there, maybe getting worse. A neighbor comments on it -- she is concerend and will let the Home Owners Association (HOA) president know about it. I begin to be mildly concerend.

On my return to work, I make a few phone calls, of course I can't get through to the management company. I call the housecleaning woman and she says she didn't spill anything in the house while she was there... Now I'm really starting to worry, because that means the water must have been coming up from underground somehow. This isn't happening -- the DAY before closing. RIGHT in front of my unit.

I make a few more calls from work, and its sinking in now that there's a water main break and its causing water to seep into my place. Frantically, I try to get some assurances that plumbers are on their way (finally reached the management). Of course, it will be a few hours before they can get there.

I return to my condo, to find increasing damage to the floors -- water is now buckling the laminate in my hallway! And all I can do is sit out front and watch the water pour out of the ground... One hour, two hours... Meanwhile, I haven't even talked to my realtor yet, as she is in a seminar all day. Finally, a plumber arrives, but oh too bad, he's not going to DO anything about it, he's just going to "assess the situation" but his repair crew is on another job. He assesses my unit and agrees with me: the water has backed up underground and is seeping in through my main line in the closet, then spreading out on the floors. I've tried to stuff a towel there to soak up the leak, but it doesn't seem to be doing much... Plumber #1 leaves, having done nothing. One more hour passes and finally the "real" plumbers arrive to fix the problem. 2:30PM They dig around and finally identify the leak, after digging up my whole front yard and leaving HUGE piles of soaking red clay-dirt and a hole the size of a large grave. This hole, mind you, is continually filling with water at a rapid pace, as the leak continues to flow. No-one has shut off the water yet, nor do they seem to be pressed to do so. They try to "divert" the drainage out to the street (away from the building) by tapping into a drain line. Then they take off to "go get parts". 4:30 PM I remain, still putsing around trying to take care of the water inside, update my realtor (who has finally gotten back to me), meeting with my AC repairman to ensure that this isn't actually a ridiculous coincidence of an AC leak (used it that morning) at the same time as a water main break. It isn't.

I go back outside, 5PM, to find the hole is now completely re-filled with water (apparently their drain plan wasn't working) and run back inside and yes, its leaking in again. More damage occuring. I run out and begin to bail out this huge pool of muddy, red water by myself, as the guys are still gone and no-one else is around. I'm in work clothes, too, a t-shirt and skirt, which is now hitched up to my mid-thigh as I'm bailing this water. My feet are completely mud-covered. People pass by and give me strange looks... I'm generally too pissed to explain. I call the plumbing company and ask, where the hell are these guys, the water is leaking back into my unit and I'm out here bailing the damn hole myself! "Oh, I'll call them up on the radio and let them know, maam." Sure. Thanks.

The bailing continues with no sign of the plumber guys for AN HOUR AND A HALF. I'm sweaty, covered in mud, mosquitos are attaking me, my phone is almost dead, I've called the place 3 times to try to get them back here but no-one. 90 minutes of unanticipated squat-thrusts and bucket-lifting. At least that will make up for me not going to yoga as planned at 5:45.

6:30 PM The plumbers return: "What on earth are you doing?" "Bailing out your hole!" "Why?" Etc. Then begins the search to turn off the water to the whole complex. But no-one can find the shut-off valve. No-one, not HOA people, residents, management, knows where this is. Are you kidding me? Takes an hour to find it -- they almost had to call 911 and have it shut off at the street. I've taken this brief opportunity to return home and rinse off, change clothes and grab my camera for documentation purposes. I return, 7:50PM. The water is off FINALLY and they are fixing the pipe. 5-6 people, board members and community folks, are congragated on my steps, watching, spinning wheels, generally being useless, and I'm right there with them.

The job is completed at about 9:30PM. They leave the huge hole and mud piles and dirt everywhere, saying they will return to clean it up tomorrow. I snap some shots of the final damage to the flooring, and head back home. The walk-through is scheduled for 9:30AM the next day (today) and there's no way this woman will close with that new damage. I just hope she doesn't walk away from the table. Sleep comes fast and heavy -- I'm exhausted.

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